July 2012
zanderbeans: facebook continues to be 40% white... →
zanderbeans:
facebook continues to be 40% white guys making pages called ‘THIS PAGE IS 2 OFFEND YU’ and then spewing giant amounts of sexist racist bullshit photos and then a whole lot of other white males and sometimes white females commenting on the awful photos saying LOLOLOL UMAD OPPRESSED PEOPLE CAUSE DAT…
6 tags
Chapter 2. Genesis
Raymond was born on the 15th of March 1934 at St Leonard’s Women’s Hospital, Kipling. His descent from womb to world signified the beginning of his life, his bane. There was something wrong with Raymond’s face, there was something missing. The first thought that ran through McClusky’s mother, Gina McClusky nee Hollier’s mind when she first held Raymond, was why had God given her, a good and pious...
3 tags
Chapter 1. The Exodus
By the time Raymond McClusky had stolen a bike and fled town, he had well and truly lost God. In fact, he had been Godless for quite a while; and one could question if he actually ever was God-full. Although a smart one wouldn’t bother, for it wouldn’t make the things that this man did any more believable, nor acceptable. McClusky would be sad to know that he didn’t leave his intended impression...
Fruition
I can taste all of the fruits of my future.
My Favorite Harry Potter Spells
meganamram:
Avada Kedavra
Expecto Patronum
Mariska Hargitay
Finite Incantatem
Tupac Shakur
Colbert Report
Jamba Juice
Homenum Revelio
Iced Carmel Macchiato
Terri Schiavo
Malignant Carcinoma
Carmageddon
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Wingardium Leviosa
Bingblardium Bleviblosa
Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon
Pilates Instructor
How I Met Your Mother
Abracadabra
Megan Amram: Celebrity Fragrances →
meganamram:
Get ready for a new batch of celebrity perfumes and colognes in 2011!
CELEBRITY: Donald Trump
TITLE: Firéëd (For Her)
SCENT: Musk, burnt orphans, a diamond shaped like a ruby, burnt eyelashes, crème, Obama’s Kenyan birth certificate, some slaves
***
CELEBRITY: Guy Fieri
TITLE:…
My Favorite Harry Potter Spells
meganamram:
Avada Kedavra
Expecto Patronum
Mariska Hargitay
Finite Incantatem
Tupac Shakur
Colbert Report
Jamba Juice
Homenum Revelio
Iced Carmel Macchiato
Terri Schiavo
Malignant Carcinoma
Carmageddon
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Wingardium Leviosa
Bingblardium Bleviblosa
Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon Carmageddon
Pilates Instructor
How I Met Your Mother
Abracadabra
Political Ben & Jerry's Flavors: 2011
meganamram:
Rick Berry
Malt Romney
Occu-Pie Wall-nut
Donut Ask, Don’t Caramel
ChocoPie GumBall Street
Women’s Right to Chews* (*Taffys)
Marshmell’ Bachmann
Marshmell’ Choc-mint
Troy Davis’ Capital PunishMint
Rick Santorum Is A Homosexual Assdouche Fudge Swirl
Snickerhead Ranch
Megan Amram: Quiz: Do You Have Cancer? →
meganamram:
Do you have cancer? Find out with this fun, flirty quiz!!
1. It’s the middle of class and your crush looks over to see you:
a. Texting him!
b. Paying attention to the teacher. Come on – it’s class!
c. Picking at a large new mole that has recently developed on your forearm!
*
Megan Amram: New Year's Resolutions: Year 3012 →
meganamram:
Lose fifteen pounds from your problem areas (hips, fifth and fourteenth space-boobs, vestigial face)
*
Spend more time with your government-rationed .452 of a son or daughter
*
Take the family on a trip to www.nature.com
*
Volunteer at your local chapter of the White People…
Bad Adjectives To Use At A Wine Tasting
meganamram:
Curdled
Chubby
Shrimp-flavored
Like white wine but red
Boiling
Deep-dish
Circumcised
Like bad wine
Black
Tastes like what I had as a kid in the orphanage
Wife material
Like booze-gravy
Winey
Gay
Megan Amram: Paula Deen’s Health Food Cookbook →
meganamram:
Recently, Paula Deen has admitted that she’s had Type II Diabetes for years. Accordingly, she’s putting out a cookbook of healthy food. Here are some excerpts!
FRUIT SALAD
INGREDIENTS:
1 lb. bag of Skittles
3 cups ranch dressing
DIRECTIONS:
Mix well. Serve room temperature.
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